


Burn Out

by TinyPaper



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fainting, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hugs, Light Angst, M/M, Multi, Night Terrors, Nightmares, Open to Interpretation, Overworking, Polyamorous Character, Self-Doubt, Sleep Deprivation, Sleepiness, Sleeping Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:34:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24301435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinyPaper/pseuds/TinyPaper
Summary: Joe had to leave for some family business, leaving Stephen having to finish their assignment alone. What he didn't expect was the burn out.And the nightmares.[ COMPLETED ]
Relationships: Daniel Lim & Stephen Ng, Daniel Lim/Stephen Ng, Hosuh Lee & Daniel Lim, Hosuh Lee & Daniel Lim & Stephen Ng, Hosuh Lee & Stephen Ng, Hosuh Lee/Daniel Lim, Hosuh Lee/Daniel Lim/Stephen Ng, Hosuh Lee/Stephen Ng
Comments: 5
Kudos: 59





	1. Chapter 1

A low groan escaped his lips as he felt himself falling in and out of consciousness. His usual messy mop of hair looked as though it went through a tornado and then some; several strands of lilac sticking out from places it shouldn't have been. His clothes were rumpled and horribly sticky from sweat as it clung to the man's skin like an infectious disease. Several books of varying thicknesses lay sprawled out on the kitchen table, along with a mix matched set of highlighters and pens thrown around the wooden surface. Pieces of crumpled paper littered the tiled floor; the owner having lost all sense of tidiness hours prior. 

His muscles ached in a way that shouldn't have been considered normal for a man of his age. Dark, grey circles hung beneath his eyelids grew painfully heavier with every passing hour. He was almost sure that he only ever used one mug to drink the dreaded coffee yet the way the object swam in his vision, making him see double was making him second guess himself. If the splitting headaches didn't indicate anything, the fact he had to forcefully swallow down the choked sobs in his throat was enough to prove he was losing his senses.

Stephen knew he needed to rest. Maybe some sleep, a shower and something proper to eat aside from energy bars and stale coffee. Yet he was here, sitting at the kitchen table surrounded by textbooks he wished he could just burn to ashes already. All because he made the worst mistake to cover his assigned group member's fraction of work since he apparently needed to step out due to some family business. Honestly, if murder wasn't an option in his mentality book before, it definitely was now.

So now, not only did he have to balance daily classes but he also needed to complete an assignment that was supposed to be done with two people. Great, just great. Fuck you, Joe.

Normally, he would've followed his own common sense and stop working by now but knowing his professor whom would never tolerate last minute work and progressively check in on the students' work, he wasn't willing to risk putting himself through that hell. Not when he had other things to do aside their stupid assignment. So, here he was, pulling an all- nighter he didn't want to do. 

In fact, he looked down upon sleeping late in the morning. In contrast to his aggressive display, he was actually the more logical one between the three. He believed if something only caused yourself more harm than good, it was stupid. Taking care of your body and mind first was top priority before even thinking about meddling in other people's business. "Love yourself first and foremost, then everyone else comes second. " as he quoted in a video before. 

He would often be the one to carry or even force both Hosuh and Dan into bed with him when they stayed up late for work; because be damned his sake, those two couldn't ever process to actually think with a brain sometimes. 

Well, isn't this situation pretty ironic ?

He didn't know when his head dipped but he didn't have time to catch himself, which resulted in him accidentally banging his forehead against the hard, wooden surface with a painfully loud 'thunk' which was followed by a string of incoherent cursing. To which he regretted doing immediately when he heard footsteps making it's way to the kitchen.

"Stephen ?"

There, standing in the hallway; in a grey tank top and loose pajama shorts with a bedhead so bad you would think it's a bird's nest. 

Daniel.

"Why are you still up ? It's so late." the man asked in slight concern as he walked over to the fridge. Needless to say, the younger male was surprised himself when he looked over to the tiny clock on their island table; indicating it was nearing 3 am. He didn't think he would've stayed up this late. He was brought back to reality when he heard the sound of the fridge being opened behind him. 

" I should ask the same about you" the man replied questionably, attempting to change the subject.

" I got thirsty." the green haired man replied plainly while pulling out an opened carton of milk; taking a swig out of it directly, much to the other's displeasure. With a smack of his lips, he put back the milk before making his way to the table. 

" While you on the other hand are still busy doing work that you said you'd finish tomorrow ?" he questioned whilst scanning the mess he made. 

Stephen said nothing as he tried to focus on something else besides Daniel's lime green hair. He resisted the urge to squint at the neon-like colour. The fact that he currently found the tone a complete eye sore was something bizzare to him. Normally, he would find comfort in the green; often ruffling the man's hair out of boredom or mere admiration. Had it always been this bright ? 

" You should go to bed."

I should.

" You're not my mom, Daniel."

That doesn't give me an excuse to be awake.

" Stephen, you need to rest."

I know. It's so loud.

" Bug off Dan, I'm busy." 

Why am I being so stubborn ? My head hurts.

" You can finish this tommor- "

Shut up. You're too loud.

" Jesus Christ, could you shut the fuck up !?"

"Guys ?"

The two quickly turn their heads to the source of the sound, to find their other housemate, standing by the stairway; still rather groggy from sleep. Wearing nothing but boxers. His platinum white hair draped from his shoulders messily without its usual ponytail and his face was contorted into a mix of a daze and confusion.

"Go back to sleep, Hosuh." the two said in unison, both not wanting anymore commotion than necessary. Stephen didn't remember standing up or even why he did in the first place. His knuckles were turning sheet white from gripping the sides of the table like it was a lifeline, keeping him from swaying because as much as he didn't want to admit it, his legs were gonna give out anytime now. The noises around him sounded muddled; distant and faded. His vision betraying him again; the only things he could identify were mixed colours and deformed shapes. 

Somewhere beside him, somebody was calling his name but he couldn't seem to figure out who it was. All he could pay attention to was how badly his head was throbbing. It felt like there were hundreds of pointy needles delicately stabbing his skull, showing no signs of mercy in relieving the pain.

He didn't know what happened next. His surroundings went blank. When he did regain consciousness, he was no longer standing but back to being seated on the plastic chair. Both of his friends were on their knees, facing him at eye level with worried expressions adorning their faces. As the ringing began to fade away and his eyes cleared itself from its tears, he could properly make out what they were shouting about.

" Stephen ! Can you hear me ? It's Hosuh." 

" Hosuh ?"

Hosuh visibly let out a heavy sigh in reaction to the youngest's quiet reply. He heard Daniel say " Oh, thank God" under his breath and Hosuh couldn't agree any less.

Just a few minutes ago, he had went downstairs after hearing some noises coming from kitchen. To his misfortune, he was met with his two housemates in some sort of quarrel. The poor man didn't have to ask upon seeing the clutter of books and papers on the kitchen table with a pale, dead looking Stephen sitting in his chair; appearing to pass out on the floor any moment.

And who would've thought his assumption was accurate.

Not even 5 seconds after he unceremoniously stood up from his seat, the man suddenly collapsed without a warning. He would have even knocked his head on the tile floor if it weren't for Daniel catching him right as he about to hit the ground. The first 10 seconds were agonising as the two propped the fainted man back on to the chair; trying to coax him awake. To their luck, the purple mohawk haired man responded quickly.

Stephen looked around the room, almost confused how he had gotten himself here. Like a child lost in a store. Daniel took notice of this and made haste by doing a technique Elias had done to him once during middle school. 

"Hey Stephen, could you close your eyes and name three things you smell right now ?" 

Hosuh stepped aside, allowing the man to take control over the situation. Daniel was better at these one to one talks than anyone he knew in his lifetime. He could only sit aside and observe the scene in third person. Dan quickly took place were the eldest previously sat and attempted to bring their friend back to reality.

Stephen could only obediently oblige, and closed his eyes. He took a moment to take in the sensations around him before hesitantly whispering his answers.

" Uh, I smell, um, old coffee ?"

"Ok good, I need two more things, Stephen."

" Umm, I- I smell apples ? Oh, it's Daniel's shampoo. Also, uhh, Hosuh's detergent. Smells like flowers."

Dan smiled at the improved answers. Good. The next step was-

" Ok, you're doing great, could you gimme two things you can hear right now ?"

" Uh, your voice and then there's a ticking clock somewhere?"

"Good. Open your eyes and name one thing you see. "

The man opened his eyes and looked around the small kitchen before letting his eyes befall on his friends.

" You guys."

Both Daniel and Hosuh couldn't help but grin at the man's answer. The shortest of trio moved closer and took hold of both Stephen's hands; rubbing slow circles on tops of them. " You feeling better now ?"

"Yeah, I think so. I'm just ...tired" was the only thing the man could find the strength to say. He leaned his head closer so it was against Hosuh's; finding peace in being within the other's presence. The silver haired man always had that type of effect on people, bringing anyone comfort by just standing in their close proximity. His pale blue eyes reminded you of flying through bright sunny skies and through fluffy white clouds. Like what he was doing to Stephen at the moment, his coos and words of comfort felt warm and sweet, almost like a mother's embrace. There was also something very comforting about how he always smelled like floral clothes softener or peach scented hair conditioner.

A small whine escaped his lips when he felt another wave of headaches wash over him. If he wasn't feeling burn out before he even collapsed, there was no way escaping the truth that he was now. Daniel, fully understanding what the other was experiencing; decided it was about time they took care of this heaping pile of a burnt out college student.

He walked over to the two and grabbed one of Stephen's arms and slung it around his shoulder. Hosuh understood what he was trying to do but thought of another better idea that would save them both time. He turned around so his back was facing Stephen, to which he quickly hoisted the man on his back; piggyback style. If it were up to Stephen, he would've been beyond embarrassed but considering how weak he felt, he couldn't bother to say no at being carried like this. Hell, he'd call himself lucky. It wasn't everyday you could ask the male to carry you like a princess. He often forgot that behind that soft exterior of an angel was a fucking body builder. The mentioned was never one for fights but if push came to shove, he could knock out anyone that came in his line of sight. Even Gavin, who he knew for a fact was built like a barn.

Daniel followed them up the stairs with Hosuh being careful not to trip on the steps. By the time they made it to Stephen's room, the mentioned was so close to falling asleep. The eldest soon laid the man down on his bed; carefully undressing him while Dan went over to his closet and picked out a set of pajamas for the other to change into. After a few minutes of struggling, they managed to help the youngest into his night clothes. After he settled himself into bed, the two were just about to leave the room when Stephen grabbed ahold of Daniel's hand. 

"Stay"

And the latter couldn't even say no if they tried. With whatever little room there was left on the bed, they managed to get themselves comfortable and snuggled into the sheets with Stephen being sandwiched between the two. He loved the way Daniel's warm breath against his nape sent tingles down his spine and how Hosuh's gentle back massages was lulling him to a deep sleep. He couldn't ask for a better way to spend his night. 

'To hell with that assignment ' he thought. He'd rather be punished than to give up a night like this with the people he loved. And if there was anything that could make his sleep anymore perfect than what it was right now, it was the sentence Daniel announced just as he was fell into slumber.

"We love you Stephen."


	2. Night Terrors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Hosuh thought tonight was the end of it. Little did they know over-exhaustion could be a bitch.

His surroundings were blank and grey. Like a picture painted in black and white. The bed was freezing as Stephen shifted from his previous sleeping position, yet he could somehow feel himself sweating bullets despite the chilling temperature. His arms and legs felt unnaturally heavy as he tried to get out of bed as though he were trapped deep underwater, the air almost too difficult to breathe. When he finally managed to sit up straight, his vision swam in blurs and unrecognisable shapes of greys, blacks and whites. 

Something was definitely wrong; very off. Yet, he couldn't tell whether it was just him or the room.

His bedroom door was ajar; a bright unnaturally white light peeking through the open space. He felt drawn to walk out without a much proper reasoning for the eerie atmosphere. Without much thinking, he stepped out the door, to reveal he was in the living room. 

It shouldn't have done that. His bedroom and living room were supposed to be on two separate floors. Stephen didn't think much of it as he made his way to the television. He didn't remember when he grabbed the remote to which he quickly flicked it on, unsure why he wanted to even watch it in the first place.

Static. Even as he flicked through the other channels, he was only welcomed with monotone noise. The screeching static noise coming from the metal box was almost deafening, his ear drums pounding in his head. The more he stared at the screen, he realised it was ever so slowly morphing into colour.

Red.

Crimson red liquid was dribbling from the top corners of the glass screen; an odd smell coming off from it that made Stephen want to gag.

Blood.

The metallic scent filled the now empty room but Stephen was far too panicked to even care of his surroundings. Unconsciously, he took several steps backwards; in hopes he could get further away from the blood which was now pooling on to the floor. He felt his back hit against something but it was far to soft for it to have been a wall. 

He quickly turns around to reveal a pair welcoming faces, relief flooding his systems only for it to be immediately replaced with sickening dread. Both of his bestfriends were staring at him, wearing expression he had never seem them have. Their eyes were devoid of feeling as they stared into his own sets of lavender; fear creeping into his mind as his whole body shook involuntarily. Their features looked discoloured, replicating the black and white room.

Chills ran down his spine as his feet were soaked in oddly warm liquid to which he realised was the blood that had now begun to fill up the void space. He tried calling for help from his companions but they remained still as they kept staring at him; unfazed by the fact the blood had now reached ankle level.

Before Stephen could even register what to do next, the sound of Hosuh's voice surrounded the small space but it was much different compared to the one he was normally accustomed to. It was deep and echoing; each word laced with absolutele spite as his face contorted into something of a grudgeful expression that looked all to foreign on Hosuh's normally peaceful face.

" Look at you. Such a pathetic waste of trash. A good for nothing lowlife. Why would anyone love you ?"

The words cut into Stephen deeper than any knife could have ever done. Tears flowed shamelessly down his pale trembling face as the bloody pool had already reached knee height. He cringed at the warm feeling but couldn't help but tremble in utter fear as he clung to nothing.

" Hahaha... Look at him tremble. The little play of bravery had been nothing but fake all this time hasn't it ? What a shithead. Why would we ever be friends with you ?"

This time it was Dan who spoke up, the cackle seeming all but pleseant in the frightened man's ears. He hesitantly looked down for a moment only to regret it once he saw the thick red liquid had reached stomach deep. Looking back up was nothing but welcoming as his friends' face were now hollow and empty. Black holes replaced where their eyes and mouth once was, blood streaming out of them in a clear, heavy stream.

The blood had now reached his chest; the warmth helping nothing to contain his shaking. He tried to scream for help but his mouth was zipped shut. The static noise that had been filing the room was morphed into something of distorted laughter; volume just as loud the static was seconds prior.

He attempted to let out one last pleading cry.

He woke up.

Stephen sat bolt-upright, screaming as he did as the remnants of his dream still continued playing out in his mind. Both Daniel and Hosuh who were previously in a deep sleep, were now wide awake and alert, a panicked look on their faces as they looked for the source of their wake. Their eyes fell upon Stephen's shivering body as the realisation hit that the person who screamed was their friend. 

"You okay Stephen ? Stephen ? Talk to me man. " Daniel asked, now concerned at how quiet his friend had gotten. After putting their youngest friend to sleep; with the exception they both slept with him, Daniel thought that was the end of it. Just another normal night. He had almost forgotten about the fact that Stephen was the type to experience night terrors ever so often. In his defence, he had only known about this when they moved in together a few months prior.

The man in question didn't reply. Stephen’s breaths were drawn in desperately as he wrapped his arms around himself, his body still shaking now with the force of his sobs. He couldn’t really remember all of what he dreamt about but the sickening color of crimson red and the feeling of being engulfed by an unsettling warmth still lay fresh and prominent on his mind, like an infectious disease.

The three sat in awkward silence, both his roommates left unsure on what to really do before Hosuh, being slow and cautious so as not to scare Stephen any further, pulled his friend into a hug.

Stephen latched onto Hosuh immediately, clinging to him like he was a lifeline and crying out onto his shoulder and Hosuh could only sit quiet and endure despite the bone crushing squeeze. Daniel followed suit, joining the two’s embrace from the other side. They let him cry as they both quietly tried to soothe him the best they could, letting out soft coos and words of reassurence. Which gratefully helped their friend relax to a certain degree. 

None of them said much as they allowed the youngest to revel in the warmth that was much different compared to the icky, murky heat he had from his dream, the only sounds that could be heard were the occasional car or van that passed by the neighborhood at the ungodly hour. Once his grip started to slacken Daniel spoke up softly, asking Stephen what happened.

As he lifted his head from Hosuh's shoulder and rubbed at his puffy, tear- stricken eyes, the man felt embarrassed for crying like a baby in front of his friends all because of a stupid bad dream. His shoulders loosened as he leaned his head into Dan's shoulder, grateful when he showed no obligations to disagree with his actions. 

" It- It was just a bad dream." he started.

" Do you wanna talk about it ?" Hosuh prompted. 

Stephen hesitated. There was one lingering question that he dared asking, all for the sake of his mentality but he wasn't sure how he should've phrased it without sounding like a complete wimp. 

Noticing his hesitancy, Dan reassured the tired man that neither him nor Hosuh would have no proper reason to judge him for his worries. Seeing Hosuh's silent agreement, he spoke up 

"I- Actually- um- , I don't know how to exactly say this right but- uh- ... Do you guys think I'm an asshole or something ? Like a really bad one ?"

The other two were almost surprised at the odd question. Stephen, a bad person ? Him ? Sure, there were many times throughout the years they've been together where he would come up with malicious remarks of violence but at the end of the day, they both knew Stephen meant no harmful intent in his words once so ever. 

Hell, Stephen was somebody who appreciated the softer, more delicate things in life more than anyone else they knew. Cute animals, soft beds, sugary sweets and picnics. These were the things that Stephen loved, much to everyone's surprise. Within that sturdy mask of curses words and proclaimed violent tendencies, was a giggly and childish person who's intentions were to make people happy and look past the world's dark and gruesome reality and enjoy the little things in life. 

It hurt the both of them to think that their friend would think of himself in such a way.

"Oh Stephen, is this what this is all about ?" Hosuh said, his heart breaking at the way his friend looked away in guilt.

"I- Yeah, I know it's dumb. I- It just bothers me sometimes. I probably am anyway. I'm sor-." 

"What ? No, no, no, Stephen." Daniel butt in, wanting to rid of his friend's self harmful thoughts. He pulled him into another tight embrace which Stephen returned without much hesitancy. Hosuh joined in, making sure their friend was surrounded by their love and affection. 

" We would never think like that. You're not a bad person and none of us think you would ever be. You're a wonderful friend and that will never change for as long as we live." Dan exclaimed; tears brimming.

"But I-"

"No buts. When we say you're not a bad guy, we mean it." Hosuh cut in, not wanting the crying man to finish his self-depreciating sentence.

"Ok." was all he could say before slumped into the embrace, allowing himself to bask in the warmth.

A few minutes passed before the youngest let out an audible yawn. That spoke enough words for the three of them. "Heh, you need something ?" Dan piped, figuring it was about time they went back to bed.

"Sleepy ..."

Hosuh hummed in agreement and pulled Stephen down, back onto the mattress and pulled the covers over the trio. They made small talk about odd scenarios as they let fatigue sweep them back to a peaceful sleep. Noting that Stephen had gotten quiet, the two looked over at him, finding that he had fallen back asleep at some point and looked much more peaceful than before; the nightmare seemingly having all but been forgotten. They let out a quiet giggle as they both pulled him closer, making the man was well protected. 

As Dan's eyes fluttered shut, he vaguely heard the eldest whispering something; short but full of adoration.

"We love you, Stephen."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I know I said this story was completed but I was tired at 2 am and I felt what better way then to make some angst. Lol. 
> 
> Real note though, fatigue can take your brain to bad places so like I said in the previous chapter, if you're working, make sure to take a break every now and then before going back to work. Coming from someone who's had such experiences, trust me when I say you do not wanna put yourself in that situation.
> 
> This has been a message by the author to gat some rest !

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this ! 
> 
> I don't really have much to say here except that burn out is terrible. So, don't try to overwork yourself, take a break for a while and then come back to work when you feel up to it. 
> 
> This has been a friendly reminder from the author to take care of your health !


End file.
